kivikakk.ee

Dreamt of an old friend.

Not been in touch in many years — lost in the friendship group rift after a breakup — but we were once close, and would stretch time and plans to see each other when we’d be on the same continent.

In the imaginal, we were both at some kind of chill gathering, a quiet house party, and it was wrapping up. It’d be the last time I’d see them before they were due to fly out, and we had a corner of the room to ourselves.

I remember gently resting my head against their chest, and then — looking into each other’s eyes — very tenderly and gently sharing affirmations of our mutual love.

Missed you.

raid boss

no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here… nothing valued is here. What is here was dangerous and repulsive to us.

screenshot of a terminal window showing some combination of Docker and Nix commands

mi pila

A few weeks (months?) ago I thought it’d be neat to have a little pop-up window visualising the output of jj, so I could look at the changelog graph change in real-time as I did commands, rather than checking Tl (jj log) repeatedly.

En route, I really wanted to know what song was playing on my Inkplate, so I hastily threw together suena and a script for calling it over the network.

As I started learning how to use jj-lib, I decided it was finally time I would not just push it to GitHub, but make my own. nóssa is very much a work-in-progress, but it’s functional (and backed up) enough that I can just keep everything there now. Along the way I learned to produce commit graphs the same way jj does, and get used to git2-rs, which has been neat.

While pushing LiveViews a little too hard, I found I needed another Elixir/Phoenix project to work on, since nóssa’s a first-of-the-kind for me and I needed to learn faster and spread the mistakes out a little. Redoing my blog seemed like a good opportunity. I’ve been putting off posting more until I finally got asset management done, but then I was finding the compile/Nix-realisation-time on my VPS prohibitive, so now I have a really big homelab server (mothdust!) for the first time in forever.

Now I’m thinking I’ll want a caching reverse proxy that sits on a very small VPS, so that if mothdust goes down, GET requests can still work. And maybe I can make it do the upstream requests over the Erlang network instead of just being a dumb client. Among other things, this avoids having to bypass Anubis or similar things another way, and could also e.g. fetch a list of known pages to “pre-render” the site into cache, purge the cache automatically on code updates and content edits, etc.? I’m particularly trying to have fun with my website, because why not? It’s a part of me.

sueños

my dreams press in on me

acumulando

un till i more often reminisce of them than of this

they bubble to the top, and over

cosas pequeñas

  • Got sick of having to do a half dozen VCS and Nix operations just to publish a new blog post; after a lifetime of managing to avoid it, gave in to the ultimate yak shave and wrote a little blog engine. (You’re reading from it now!)
  • Got sick of waiting as long as I do for compiles on my VPS and ordered the bits for a little homelab server, which will probably replace the VPS entirely (though maybe I’ll keep a very small node for a static IP1 and not putting my home IP out there). Soon this blog will be hosted from home \o/
  • Ketamine consult was straightforward. I can’t say it sounds promising, but I’m going through the motions to get a quote from a hospital.
  • CLONIDINE. Taking that at night now, and fuckity fuck the night sweats are almost a non-issue, just at 50µg?! Holy grail. Life feels significantly less shit.
  • Autumn is so welcome.

just now

Annie: “Kas sa tead [unintelligible]?”
Talya: “Kas ma tean.. mida?”
Annie: “Prawn?”
Talya: “Kas ma tean… prawn?”
Annie: nods
Talya: “Tean küll. Oled sina.”

  1. we’re in CGNAT territory out here :/